Definition of agency
plural agencies
1 a : the office or function of an agent (see agent 4)
b : the relationship between a principal and that person's agent
3 : a person or thing through which power is exerted or an end is achieved : instrumentality
- communicated through the agency of the ambassador
4 : an establishment engaged in doing business for another
- an advertising agency
5 : an administrative division (as of a government)
- the agency for consumer protection
1) I don't drive.
Now I can drive. As a Californio I have driven quite a bit in my life. I started driving in college, when a former cop friend taught me how. He was calm and patient and talk me some tricks to get around my monocular vision and enormous blind spot. Back then I would easily kick off 400 miles in a week-end, no problem. Put some Old White Guy* music in, pop open a Jolt cola and off I go.
But when I moved back home the Reign of Driving Terror began. I went through four cars in twelve years, all but the last bought from my family, all of which at best received no care or maintenance over their lifetimes. They died of something-or-other every other month, nickle and dime-ing me while I was trying to start my career, until the first three were sabotaged. I think they were actively trying to kill me a few times there. So figure an "accident" every two months, the car dying in the middle of an intersection or getting bullied in a repair shop** and three major accidents.
And for some reason the cops in my hometown loved to pull me over. They rarely gave me a ticket but I was pulled over for warnings at least once a month, and a few times a week one followed me closely from one end of town to the other.
I also had my tags stolen on a regular basis. Another good reason to get pulled over. Just so I could show them my police report. Over and over and over again.
Now I have driving anxiety so bad I can't even drive a mile to the grocery store. Toward the end of my driving career I tended to dissociate while driving, I would have to pull over until I re-connected with reality long enough to drive safely. I would literally black out behind the wheel. I combated that by eating continuously while driving, the better to stay grounded. Not healthy for the waistline.
So now I don't drive.
2) Our car is dead
Even if I did drive our old Buick decided to kick it, more or less. Something electrical again, it's randomly shutting down while moving. Not good. And given that it's 23 years old repairing it is going to be an expensive proposition. So it's parked except for emergencies.
But we have a back-up plan. I qualify for paratransport. Paratransport is what they offer when you can't drive or get to the regular bus stop, which in my case is a mile away down busy roads with no sidewalks. And with my knees*** walking is not going to happen. If that's the case the bring the short bus to you.
3) I can't use paratransport.
I get really bad motion sickness. Maybe it's the monocular vision, maybe it's all the ear infections, maybe it's just me, but riding in a car does me in anymore. On longer trips I try to sleep, but across the valley is bad. Sometimes even across town gets to me. To try to deal I use all the tricks, sit in front, eyes out the window, music to distract, aromatherapy, sip ginger ail, nibble crackers, the coldest air in my face that I can. And I make it work, mostly. I am usually very glad when the car stops but I make it work.
None of those tricks work on the short bus.
Sit in front? No, that's where the wheelchairs go. Those of us who can walk get the back. Cold air? Nope, little old ladies wear boiled wool jackets on 90 degree days. AC is a dream. And if you take your fan you have to carry it. Aromatherapy? Not allowed. Eating? Not allowed. Drinking? Not allowed. Seeing out the windshield? You sit above the driver, you can see the car in front, maybe. Music? The driver wants to talk. Headphones are rude.
And it's not door-to-door. It's some random, careening around the valley. A ten minute drive can take an hour and a half, while they pick other people up and drop them off. They tell you to leave two hours for a one way trip.
On the last trip I was so sick when I got home that I was shaking and green. I spent an hour and a half in that hell to spend five minutes getting a new card. And I have to wait 30 in their office to get a ride home. I was so sick on the way back that even the driver noticed. I staggered in to lay on my bed for two solid hours before I could even manage water.
I've taken to calling it the Blender of Nausea, rattling around in the back of the short bus for hours of misery at a time.
Sooooo I am using my agency.
I am staying home until we either buy a new car or move somewhere where I can travel on my bike. I am working on getting back up and down the Hill of Doom so I can at least go over for coffee, and I will pay for an Uber to get to a Drs appointment, but otherwise I'm staying home.
My power, my decision. Nothing out there is worth being that sick
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* My students used to say I liked to listen to Old White Guys. Bruce Hornsby, James Taylor, Robbie Robertson, Kenny Loggins. Also A Prairie Home Companion. It made a great soundtrack for driving across California's Central Valley.
** After the time I went in for a new tire to one of my stepfather's gypsy friends and got screamed at, literally, because I had to have four, only to call the cops to get my car back and have my mother show up to yell at me for getting into this mess and insisting that I pay the exorbitant price, I stopped going to mechanics in my home town. It turned out the tires he sold me for new were shitty retreads, but the next time I went to a mechanic in the barrio where I was teaching. Brand new tires, half the price, and nothing but pleasant customer service the whole time. I took my last car to exclusively barrio mechanics and it went five years without a problem until I sold it.
*** I have a small area of osteoarthritis in my left knee, and have for a while, but ever since I tried to change my HRT I've had swelling and pain in both knees. It's a major mobility issue but I don't see my regular doctor until October so I'm stuck until then.
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